i once again survive another year. incredible! i'm still amazed i made it past 16 years old.

i started therapy again today. i think it went well. i took a bit of a break as my last therapist retired, and i'm glad to start back up, especially as we go further into winter. i think this and the antidepressants i've started will be a big help.

this year was a horrible year for my creativity. my depression, the pandemic, the horrendous things we're doing to fellow human beings... its no wonder that i've been so unable to make anything. however... i'm not going to be hard on myself about it. i still managed to make a couple things, and even if i didn't, it's still fine. this year was a lot. if you would like to see some drawings from this year, you can find my 2020 art gallery here. ^_^ here are some of my favs from this year:

a woman with brown, long hair in a flowing ponytail, positioned upside down. she holds her hands to her face as she cries in space, her tears floating off into the void. her nails are painted red, and she is wearing a white dress shirt, black pencil skirt, tights, and black heels.
a nonbinary person in a black bathtub. they sport short, spikey black hair, and are seen from the side. their knee is propped up and supporting a purple rubber duck, and within the tub is rainbow bubble bath. the person has a thought bubble above them, with a scribble inside of it. the image is heavily processed.
the image contains two versions of the same character, one that looks human on your left and one that is a slime person on your right. in the woman's human form, she is chubby and has long, dark hair and dark blue eyes. she wears a dark blue sweater vest over a long sleeved white dress shirt, and wears a black skirt with tights. she also sports a red ribbon at her shirt collar. in the woman's slime person form, she retains the same chubby body type and long hair, and her entire being is made of blue slime. her eyes are still dark blue as well.
there is a very tall wolf girl partying with a very short alien girl. the wolf girl has brown, short hair, blue wolf ears and tail, and wearing a red dress with thin straps. she also has a prosthetic left arm and right leg. the alien girl has long, dark turquoise hair, pale blue skin with light orange markings, a tail, and pointed ears. she is wearing a teal and gold strapless dress with transparent, detached sleeves. the two women are clinking glasses and are probably intoxicated, but are having a good time.

somehow, despite it all... my mental health has been overall better this year. i wouldn't of handled everything this well a few years ago... not a single stay at the hospital, either, this year. i think that's pretty damn impressive.

this year marked 3 years of being together with my beloved. i think that's awesome. i've never had a relationship that long before. here's for even more years!

i think that's all i have to say about my reflection of this year... its kinda head empty hours right now lol. i don't really have any solid resolutions, and i won't say them out loud because if i do... well, they won't happen, then.

it's still new year's eve for me and will be for a while... not sure what im doing tonight other than my makeup, maybe. i hope you all stay safe out there and everything. here's one of my favorite songs;